Hey y'all

Just lettin' y'all know i'm still alive.

The Fence Cutter

I am thinking about writing a novel called "The Fence Cutter", about a guy who gets his kicks by breaking the law and cutting fences.  It is an interesting plot I think, and despite the fact that the law is being broke, it seems like a pretty innocent thing to simply be cutting fences.  Also, somewhat noble.  I as a person have always not been a very big fan of fences, so I could take my anti-fence passion into the novel. 

I am thinking there will be a team of four fence cutters, 1 girl and 3 boys, and the girl would be the main characters love interest.  The first part of the novel would be them cutting the fence of a school, and it would go on to scenes of him in prison, him cutting the fence of a farm, a prison, running from cops, run ins with the sheriff, etc.  I think this would be an interesting novel, and I have been thinking about it for some time.  Chime in if you have any tidbits you would like to share.

Anyway, things for me have been going well, and although everyone says that, that is certainly the definition of life as it as of now.  Relatives recently moved to Texas, and although it was hard at the time of the move, I have been getting used to them being away.  I am going there for Thanksgiving, and am excited about going to DQ with the whole fam, it should be fun.

Anyway, Ta Ta for now and maybe I will have the beginning of a novel for you when I come back.

Sorry it was so long since the last post, I haven't necessarily been busy, just too uninspired to write a blog post, although I have been writing some poetry lately so I will make sure to get some up here.

the sound of rain like the touch of an angel

The atmosphere decided to rain a couple days ago.  It felt like a complete renewal of all that exists.  It was quite beautiful, and i sang to the birds and the trees.

I have been noticing the birds chirping a lot lately.  Just earlier as i was arising out of the tent in my mother's backyard, a bird chirped in the exact harmony as an ambulence would shriek.  It was quite amazing and although I often don't think about it, i am still baffled by it.  Maybe the bird was caged next to the hospital, or it had grown accustomed and had grown to like the noise emanating from the ambulence?  either way, i bet it amused to fellow birds.

most of my relatives are moving away.  Dad is going to Texas, brother to Georgia.  it seems now that I might be the loner bear, stuck in a small college drinking town with nothing but the possibility of a typing job, but the possibility of random miracles are always floating in the air. 

Many people when they hear the word miracle think about a newborn child or someone who luckily got innocent in some trial.  I tend to think of food for starving children, or rain drops during dry times, eye contact between two strangers longing for love... 

Everybody's priorities are different, everybody's needs are different, everybody's finances are different, and yet we all share commonalities that never cease to bring us togethor.

These days, I'm gonna turn towards books and music and typing, and when i think humanity can't handle all the junk it has polluted and manifested, i can always remember the weather patterns.

sometimes I think i'm an alien in a past life, or even in this life, just taking human form.  but all that aside: enjoy this nice bountiful day; the faculties of trees and of sweet honey, cool wind and bright contemplative sun are serving all our needs in plenty and with joy.
BYE!!!!!

hey

the weather is blistering outside, as in, it is beautiful. the soft mix of dullness and overstimulation continually renews life, bringing new experiences to the door step and blown gently through the window. passover and easter were just last week, so a rare combination of love manifested in the hearts of most religions.

one positivity of growing older is that i have lost the fear of different races and religions. it seems that i got some impressions growing up about what ethnicity is scary, and various stereotypes about various people. a lot of that has fallen off, and although i still sometimes think about how something is connected to a certain type of people, it is lighter, and there is mutual respect because we both see that in each other.

sometimes i wish i could talk to people at all times and at every moment, they are that cherished. but then i realize that it is just that my concept of time has gotten different. i am actually growing very close to these people, and i see them even more then i used to, but i cherish them so much that it seems like it has been a while.

it is fun to immerse yourself completely in any given situation or environment. last night i was able to join in the asian student association's iron chef competition and it was a blast. i felt like i was so dynamic that i was actually part of the student association, part of even the organizers of the event. although meat was being served, i felt like it was for the greater cause. hundreds of students showed up, and beautiful dishes were being served on beautiful plates. there were about 8 teams and they were pretty much of every imaginable ethnicity: malaysian, taiwanese, polish, latin american, one jewish guy. it was a magnificent experience, and i got to film it. i usually don't like filming anything, as i feel like watching t.v. isn't the best thing for the world, but as it was a new activity, a new immersion, it was fun.

We all got fed, and generally humans enjoy having a camera on them...

Yoga rave was a blast, it was similar in energy and FASTNESS but with more smiling faces and no meat eating (and no drugs and alcohol), plus tons of joy - TONS.

Oh well, i will continue to be safe in this life, breathing in the ups and downs and breathing out service. maybe the roller coaster i am currently on is about to fall off its track and start flying in some unknown direction, spinning violently into the outskirts of space, and maybe it will continue on its track, doing various loops and spins. I don't know. but what i do know, is that as i have abandoned some practices and concepts, i have gained others, and all of the people i have met are and continue to be wonderful friends.

swimmin

it's been swimming for a while, and from here on out. it is nice when life leads you to random places, but they somehow all work out and for the best. earlier today i got lost about a thousand times (well, actually only two or three), but i was driving north to find internet shoppe, and i ended up in a resting cornfield called 'archer's road.' it was actually quite beautiful, and i accepted the fact that i had no idea where this shoppe was, so i decided to rest a while and listen to a nice song on the radio. some guy playing the guitar and singing a melancholic song. it was quite nice, and i sat relaxed thinking about everything...

then, i went to where it actually was, over by the furniture store, and still couldn't find it!! so, i went into state farm and did some business which i was meaning to do for a while, and that was quite an adventure but it worked within 15 minutes and i'm pretty positive i got the good student discount. and... i found out where mediacom was!! so... in the end, i had a contract with mediacom, and would get fined a large amount if i cancelled their service, so it was completely useless, but it was such an adventure getting there!

'hey mr. tambourine man, play a song for .... i want to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free' - in the words of bob dylan in mr. tambourine man, covered beautifully by cloud cult.

you might think those lyrics are a bit wacky although i find them symbolically beautiful, the imagery is nice, whether you are comfortable acting it out or not.

hasta la vista!!

Into the Ocean

It has been raining pretty steadily on this front; an average rain, a modest, delectable precipitation. The events of Life have been chaotic and somewhat Amazon-esque although i've come out alive with the help of moderate exercise and plentiful quantities of good food. The rain is relaxing, as there is a steady supply of it and it isn't as much of a rampage today. Yesterday I woke up to a fantastic yoga session in the backyard, completely unexpected. It was wonderful because some of the best things happen when you are completely immersed in Nature, as I was at the time. The trees blow in the wind, the animals come and sniff the laundry detergent leftover from the previous wash, the sky breathes its fresh air into the hairs and pores of humanity. Although the sirens of the cop cars are occasionally going off and there is a meth conference (how uncomfortable!) at the community college i'm going to, life seems pretty good, as I know a lot of these problems will just drop off like the burst of a water balloon, only to leave a small wet circle on cement that is soon to be evaporated.

It might be nice, to grab onto a balloon, and just float up into the sky and go thousands of miles into the sky, only to look down and to smell the various objects around you. Then, the balloon slowly deflates, although instead of popping, it just gradually releases some air, letting you back down and to continue your daily affairs. This would be awesome, and I think that sometime in the near future someone should invent this. What a detachment and delight for a day that is possibly soured from some unknown condition? And also, you could pick the color of the balloon, and you could bring along a bottle of water, or chocolate, or anything!

I think it's a wonderful idea, and although it may seem impossible now, who knows? For now I will just keep moderately exercising and eating palatable foods in clay bowls.

Life

Life is such a beautiful thing, such a gift. It is so important that we spend the time we have here rejoicing. When i think about all the people in life, there are so many. It is amazing because I can think of all the people i have met and i have such an authentic relationship with each of them, so original, so fascinating. It is amazing this roller coaster of life.

I think that humans are simply animals, we are just gifted with an intellect. It is like, giraffes and lions are both animals, but giraffes are gifted with long necks. We have certain qualities just like every other animal. Animals don't look at us and are like "Oh those supreme humans, they are so stupid, they get to lord it over material nature, I wish I was one of them." No, I think that animals look at us and they see another animal, a human. They just don't have that faculty to judge. Yes, we laugh and we print money but it is because it is in our nature. In the same way, cats meow, and dogs eat poop, but it is because it is in their nature, this is how they have evolved over time.

I think getting back to our essential humanness is the key to life. Watching videos on youtube about saint-like Hyenas and messianic Lions that help each other and fellow animals of different categories, makes me think of humans. We are fundamentally human, and accepting our bad qualities and good qualities and being grateful, makes us the animal that we truly are. It is our quest to be fully human and to live life 100% with love and ferociousness that makes life so grand; so joyful.

Poetic Devices

Art is the magnificent expression of depression, symbolically leading to the lessening of the tight grip of mania. Breathing, living, loving; these are the phenomenal expression of mania, cutting the constrictive vine of depression at its very source. These two aesthetic categories mix and match in a beautiful manifestation of Life, as the nature of all beings, interconnecting us all and kindling a balance unlike any other, a balance which is a base supporting joy, compassion, and various other pleasures. Honoring the diversity and accepting the One is the plateau I have come to at this point in Life, and it feels nice. Singing from the core of my soul, to the core of the Earth and to the expansive mystery of the sky is the greatest gift I can give to whatever it is that allows us to be.

A Home In the Hills

narcissus

just got finished court reporting the novel 'The Alchemist' by Paulo Coelho. Really good book I suggest it to anyone. By the finish I started it over, and the novel began with the story of Narcissus, and mentioned the flower. Anyway, I thought it worthy to look up and I thought i'd share, so here it is:

Love

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMkxrS_eXzY

Two Gallants - Steady Rollin'

the world keeps turning

Well, here i am, sitting down, enjoying a nice bowl of pan seared potatoes and green beans, with a bit of high fructose corn syrup ketchup that, hopefully, won't be too harmful. It is nice though, i get a day off, a day to practice mandolin and enjoy the fresh air, bake a couple loaves of bread, find out that i actually am able to pick the song 'Gentle on My Mind' by John Hartford, no matter how simply. I had no idea how I'd do at the beginning of the semester, being busy and such, but it turns out fairly well, managing to get decent hours of rest. I watched this freakin' scary movie last night called House, it definitely discouraged a writing career, and most certainly discouraged watching any scary movies ever again.

Surprisingly it was filmed in the 1980's, considering how freakin' scary it was. Fortunately I am evening that out with this: a relaxing day watching bread rise.

I made a painting a couple days ago, it is basically a very bright house with a squirrel tight rope walking above a big pool of water. It is interesting, i'm pondering whether or not to donate it to the yearly silent art auction.

Oh well, the impression of that movie will slowly fade from my mind, the bread will rise, and the world will keep on turning. I don't think there is any way the world will end, I mean, there might be some major disaster, but the chances of Earth self-destructing is very small. Yes, we are getting warmer, but Nature tends it even itself out anyway, doesn't it?

No matter how good it will do, remind yourself: the world keeps on turning. After all, it is better then thinking the world is flat.

Oh yeah...All right..Feels good..Inside..

"Your drug is a heart breaker .. My love is a life taker.."

Such beautiful lines, although who knows what the second part means.

Stamina

It is the 11 Days of Peace in Southern Illinois, possibly in areas surrounding as well. This brings to mind much nice thoughts, ha, of Peace.. And things related. It seems like the world has gotten more peaceful as the days have gone by. I say this a lot, or at least used to in high school, but as I look back through the ages it appears that the people have gotten less violent, the world more peaceful. Yes, there is corruption, pollution, and many problems of that nature still persistent in today's climate, but think of the Generations - Their progress - and where we stand 'Peacefully' today.

It is beautiful outside, I rarely see violence. In the 19 years i've been kicking, I haven't seen much violence, maybe a punch here, a kick there, but nothing serious. It could be that I was raised with spiritual values - One of the most non-religious, spiritually musical Christian denomination's: the Friends society.. and a simple Jewish temple and camp. Although through the years of adolescence and surrendering to my Mother's will, I landed in a Sufi temple, an Ashram, church, etc... I still think that all of these places provided a sound and base spiritual education, despite religious attitudes.

And so i see, in the streets, Peace. It could be this is all just an expression of Light, that I choose to see the positive in the light. After all, el Guru says that Life can be compared to a movie, with the heroes just consisting of nice colors, villains in dark colors, One concept being unable to exist without the opposite concept.. And so, as I am just traveling through the world seeing and visualizing different 'projections' of light, it could be that I just register the positive, accept the Peaceful, the benevolent...

I'm sorry for the big words, am currently in a Steno Vocabulary development class, and am quite enthusiastically working on many of the assignments! as my vocabulary is improving so also is my opinion of my intellectual capabilities! Ha. And so.. if you read this, I ask you to think about time, past present and future, and ask yourself: Is the world and the people in this world progressively becoming more peaceful, are we the same? What's going on? but don't forget the divinity and joy behind it all! And so, Merci fellow people, and good day.

'Don't think I'm a D-Bag' -Journey

Don't think I'm a d-bag! this is the song of the weekend though, played on the radio during a melancholic sunset.. must be posted.